Week 10: Native American Story

The Boys Who Raced for a Girls Friendship 

This story comes from The Crane and The Hummingbird by James Mooney. In the story a hummingbird and crane race around the world to marry a young woman. The crane beats the hummingbird but the woman doesn't want to marry an ugly bird. The original story can be found at Link

Link

There once was a young girl who always played on the monkey bars on the playground. Her best friends were Joey and Mike and they loved to play with her. One day Joey asked the girl if he could be her best friend. She really did like Mike more but she wanted to be fair to her two friends. She told them that they could race all the way around the playground and the winner could be her best friend. She said the winner is the one who can be at the monkey bars first. 

The boys agreed and got ready to run as fast as they could. Mike could run faster for short period of time and Joey could run a further distance without stopping. The girl put her hand in the air and said "Ready! Set! Go!!" and the boys were off. At that moment, Mike took a clear lead and ran as fast as they could. 

Joey was much slower. But when Mike stopped to take a break, joey kept going. Mike got up from his break and passed Joey during his sprints! The 2 boys leaped frog for the first place in the run. When they got close to finishing, Joey just kept going. When Mike got to the end he had seen the Joey beat him to the girl. 

The girl didn't want Joey as his best friend, so she decided the she wouldn't have one. 

Comments

  1. Hi Hunter! I really enjoyed your interpretation of this story! I would love to see it expanded a little bit more, but I think that the simple nature of the story works well here. It kept to the theme of the original, while adding a different take to it. It was easy to follow as well. Nice work! I’m looking forward to reading more of your stories!

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  2. Hey Hunter,

    Wow, poor Joey! My dude put in all that work just to be turned down! But, I guess that's kind of the theme of the story isn't it? I think you did a good job on this story. It was a pretty effective way to "reskin" the original source material. It was short, simple, and straight to the point. Nice job!

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  3. Hi Hunter,
    I didn't know the story coming in, but I loved the way you did choose to tell it. I feel so bad for the little boy and I feel like it was so relatable because I use to race boys as a kid too. I really enjoyed how the story just flowed and kept pace through the entire story.

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  4. Hi Hunter! What a fun way to tell this story! I hadn't read the original, but I think turning it into a childhood competition is really fun and relatable. I think we all remember trying to fight the other kids to be crowned someone's "best friend." I do feel bad for Joey, but the ending is true to the original, which I appreciate. Good job!

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  5. Hi Hunter!
    I really like the formula you used to create this retelling by framing an old story by turning it into some kind of playground like competition made it seem more applicable as we have all been there in our youth. While Joey's fate is rather grim it is true to the original telling, Great Work!

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  6. Hey hunter! aww poor Joey! Nobody ended up being best friends with the girl after all the work. What a twist! haha I liked your story it was short but very engaging! I liked how you made the story more modern in a way but kept true to the ending of the original! great job! keep up the good work!

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